I just read something and assumed that it's related to me.

I think the society made me less empathetic,
like when i used to give a lot,
i either get nothing back or back something that's negative.

But the thing is, when something happen,
even if it's the smallest situation,
i try to run a lot of "test drives" in my head
how to get through a situation better than what had happened to me
or to someone else, which i heard of or witnessed.
And the conclusions are endless
depending on situations, people's feelings, and who people are to me.

Someone once told me
"kindness doesn't pay"
and i agree to a certain extent,
because i always believe in karma and, although,
maybe a kind act might not bring one coming to me,
at the very least i think this world is a lot better with people who think for others.
Selfish? Of course i am, in my own ways
(especially food wise, my good food is my good food,
takes a lot for me to share my good food with you
for it to become our good food ok.)
But selfish for the wrong reasons?
No, that's not nice.
Not saying i'm always right and all that because i'm still human,
got to survive in this mf of a society,
but try not to use people as stepping stones
or just use them for your own pointlessly selfish wants
(meaning wealth, fame and all the fucking materialistic life things ya).
AND ESPECIALLY DON'T BLAME OTHERS FOR
WHATEVER THAT'S YOUR FAULT?!
HELLOOOO?!??! DAFAK YOU DOING?!


k reading what i saw triggered something in me cos i was tolerating very long,
trying to accept another being's way of life, yknow.
How you act, what you do, what you think, how you react.
I admit, i'm nothing like the best person who has the rights to
bring someone else down because of one's flaws, so i try not to.
I react usually by.. not thinking because honestly,
i am so exhausted i just can't process words or actions half of the time.
And if you know me, you should know i rarely complain about
those close to me, unless i'm about to fucking blow up
or i just cannot keep something, that i need to rant about, in anymore.
but because i was tolerating and trying to accept this very long,
we both have faults and flaws but that?
no.
it's a yes but no, why you do that?
what is this post about now?
ugh.
Whatevs.