I think i'm having my 1/3 life crisis now.
I feel so stuck.
So i've completed my diploma course a couple of months back
like FINALLY
but then since i've failed so many times in diploma,
the thought of uni scares me now.
I can't sit and study something i'm not interested in,
and even if i can, i might not be able to memorise it.
I know, i know, if you understand it, you will remember.
But that's not how it works for me, i can even forget my daily routine and miss a step.
I can understand but forget how to put it into words.
I want to do so many things and getting a degree is one of them,
but just the thought of it feels like a anchor punching right into my heart
and dragging it down. the thought itself is so heavy.
it's pressured into thinking that i want to do it,
but i don't.
i want to learn but i don't want to study something that i have to retake several times
and trying to get that piece of paper that doesn't relate to my future job.
why am i stuck in this society?
but aren't we all.
